Inner Success, Outward Success

Three Apologies Hillary Clinton Didn’t Make and NEITHER SHOULD YOU.

According to the hacked emails from campaign chairman John Podesta, Hillary Clinton does not like to apologize.

Win or loss, in this go around, the President of the United States of America stands strong with the statements spoken, emails written, and stands taken, and they have done so without apology.  In an election cycle where we heard things we never thought we would: locker room jock talk played publicly, a candidate being blamed for the death of young military men, and the threat of a physical wall  around our country to keep people out.

And in a society where women apologize to our own demise, if nothing else, Hillary Clinton showed us how to climb the ranks without apology.  I often say we don’t have role models of successful women, and whether Mrs. Clinton is elected the President of the United States of America – she is successful and we can learn from her. Here are three things you shouldn’t apologize for and Hillary didn’t either!

TAKING TIME TO PREPARE.
She did not apologize for preparing – privately.  More than once Mr. Trump accused her of needing rest and she responded quite bluntly and frankly, she was preparing.  In an era where we expect people to be available 24/7, either in person or socially, she took the time for quiet reflection and preparation.

As successful women, preparation is a key daily function. When was the last time you took private, quiet time to prepare?  Do you take quiet time daily? Weekly? Annually? EVER? And what would that look like? Perhaps meditating for 10 minutes to prepare for your day, or waking up a half hour early to prepare for a sales call. You need to turn off the phones and the beeps and have some quiet time on occasion – and for that, YOU SHOULD NOT APOLOGIZE.

HOW YOU LOOK.
Hillary Clinton did not apologize for not “looking Presidential.”  On an occasion or two she was accused of not looking the part of a President.  Not once did she back down from that accusation and neither should you. If there is no role model before you that looks like you – it does not mean you don’t belong. You do.

Women, there are going to be times and situations where you are FIRST!  You are the ONLY.  Don’t apologize for not “looking the part.” Look at it positively, if there is no one before you – there is no precedent that you have to adhere to.  Do not apologize for looking differently and presenting yourself just as you are.  Hillary did not apologize and she was running for the top office in all of the world! You have your own unique look and style – and for that, YOU SHOULD NOT APOLOGIZE.

NOT YOUR MISTAKE.

Hillary did not apologize for situations that were actually out of her reign, expertise, and control.  When the accusations about her private server were at their peak and their highest, she didn’t apologize.  If you asked most business professionals working for the government (or any midsize or enterprise level company) they generally follow the directives of the IT person. We can’t know everything.

Women, there are times when you hire people to be the experts.  You hire people to do things to protect you and when they step out of line you know that ultimately the buck stops with you.  But when they mess up, it is their mistake, not yours.  When others fail and cause you pain, take action to course correct.  We can take responsibility for the company role in a mishap, but we don’t have to take the fall for others – and for that, YOU SHOULD NOT APOLOGIZE.

Whatever the outcome of this election, we can take this quick lesson: Ambition can lead us down a bumpy road, but that doesn’t mean we have to apologize at every pothole. Own what’s yours and play full out.

#successwithoutapology  #PoliticsNOTasUsual MyVote2016 #NeitherShouldYou #iVoted 😳     
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Inner Success, Outward Success

Are You Unfairly Labeled Bossy?

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“I think putting labels on people is just an easy way of marketing something you don’t understand.”  Adam Jones

Speaking of marketing, check out Pantene’s  commercial about labels on men and women. Pantene brings to life the quote of Mr. Jones by demonstrating how quickly we label women unfairly.  We are guilty of unfairly labeling women in leadership roles because we are ignorant of the complexity of their work, emotions, and vulnerability.   Have you ever been mislabeled bossy, when only being a stern boss?  I have for sure!

The best thing I have learned over the years is to be honest with yourself about your personality quirks and other peoples’ perceptions/labels of you, even if you feel they are incorrect. Recognize how others label you and more importantly be able to communicate how you would like to be described.  If you can label yourself properly, it will often help others understand you better.  For example, in brainstorming sessions I remind stakeholders in the room, “Hey I am in sales – sometimes I don’t know how to have a conversation without selling my ideas or thoughts.  It doesn’t mean I am right or that I am absolutely sold on my own idea, I just can’t help but sell you when it comes out of my mouth.”  So the next thing I tell them is, “Don’t let me SELL you on a policy or an idea if you know I am wrong.”  And I mean it.  By stating this up front, I may not appear as pushy or dominant as we contemplate the various ideas.

This video is a reminder to me that some labels are accurate and some just wrong!  So regardless of the label, be aware of the fact that you are being labeled.  Don’t hide from the labels, but rather face them and choose to own them, correct them, or live up to them.

I used to be labeled as bossy, but over the years I have learned to change people’s perception to think of me more as a delegator.   🙂 No really it is true, friends say  I delegate better than anyone they know.  I figured out how to change what I say from: “Mike – go get the rental car for our trip” to something like “Mike, since you are arriving earlier would you mind picking up the rental car for us?”  Ahhhh – all in the delivery ladies, all in the delivery.

So let me encourage you to make note of the labels people have on you.  Decide whether you like those labels or want to change them; decide if they are within your control to change or not.  I didn’t like being bossy, so I worked on my delivery.  I own the fact that I am salesy, so I educate those around me to not let that get us in trouble.

How do you handle the labels?  Please – take the time to tell me about a label that has been placed on you.  Tell me – how did you handle it?  Did you own it, fight it, or work to change it?  I truly want to know!

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